The christmas present you want to send back

Thanks, Putin, but we really don’t want the nuclear missiles you have promised to send to us, even if it’s Christmas wrapped. So we are returning it first-class delivery with DHS and are including our latest invention, The Jitter Bug.

Regards Ukraine, Europe, and the UK.

I am distraught with the quality of the latest photos I have received from the Epstein files. I am far better looking than they make me look. My teddy bears are incandescent and refuse to let me hang them on the wall directly above them.

Regards, The Duke of York. Bugger, I’ve lost that title.

Regards, The Prince of Whales, something fishy about that title. Bugger, I’ve lost that as well.

Regards, The Field Marshal, Bugger Momy never gave me that title. Where’s that bloody servant, Manwell?

Andrew, can I still use that name, bugger

Everyone knows that I am the greatest President that America has ever had, better than anyone, Better than anyone I’ve ever met. They are stuck in my heart, hang on every word I say.

In fact, I am simply the best

Only days until I get the World Peace Prize, but I might send it back and accept the Universe Peace Prize instead.

Regards

DJT

Donald J Trump